The sexy lady...

He told me this story the other day...when I was letting guilt overwhelm me again.

There was an old monk and a young monk travelling together. They came to the bank of a river and found that the bridge to be damaged and not accessible from their end. So they got into the river and began to wade across. Halfway through, they came across a sexy lady stranded on a part of the damaged bridge. She was wearing her expensive mink coat which couldn't get wet. Seeing this, the old monk offered to carry her across the river. The young monk was shocked "How can big brother carry a lady when we are supposed to avoid all intimacy with females?" thought the young monk. But he kept quiet.

The old monk carried the sexy lady on his back and set her down on the opposite bank. The 2 monks then continued on their journey. Meanwhile the young monk continued to brood over the matter, all this while getting angrier. In his mind, he began to formulate all kinds of accusations towards the old monk.

Finally, at a rest point many hours and several miles later, the young monk could hold it no longer, he burst out angrily at the older monk. "How can you claim yourself a devout monk, when you seize the first opportunity to touch a female, especially when she is very sexy? All your teachings to me have made me think of you as a big hypocrite."

The old monk looked surprised and said, "I had set down the sexy lady at the river bank many hours ago, why are you still carrying her along?" (At this point, my mind flitted briefly to the closing scene in the horror flick Shutter...where the ghost gal was sitting on the guy's shoulders...haha~ randomness at play)

What was he trying to tell me? In life there will be plenty of situations, people, places, things that will hurt us, make us unhappy, cause grief and incite anger. However after the moment has passed, if we do not forget about it and move on, these feelings will continue to haunt us and it will continue to hurt for as long as you allow it to.

Ever since I stopped working, I've seen a side of my parents I never wanted to acknowledge. From young somehow they always made me think that money can solve anything. But I've come to realise that they will never be happy (Tune in to later post on vicious cycles for the reason). So no matter what I do, how much effort I put in, how much guilt I place upon myself. They will not change. It must be not that bad for them to want to change I guess...so no matter how many times I beat myself up, they will still be the same. I cannot win...and I do not want to anymore.